lowwbloods:

officialwillowpape:

i searched up ‘hurdlers without hurdles’ on google and i dont regret it

these boots are made for walkin

REBLOG | Posted 1 hour ago With 9,206 notes

sixpathsofbased:

ultrafacts:

Source If you want more facts, follow Ultrafacts

Samsung is taking shots

and-the-two-idiots:

stripedpants:

My brother’s friend was starting to apply for colleges. And one of the colleges he applied to required a 3 page essay explaining what daring meant to them.

So being the clever person he was

On the each page he wrote 1 word with huge font,

THIS

IS

DARING

And he later got accepted. 

this is my favorite story on tumblr

» ATTENTION SARCASM USERS

buttlass:

tweeckos:

we’re being faced with a serious issue.

there is only 1 sarcasm left

now we’ve got to use it wisely. please, for the love of god, think before you speak. it’s gotta be good.

yeah okay, i’ll be sure to do that

pterodactylsftw:

becausebirds:

bolto:

pats

Catbird.

im melting

Expectation is the root of all heartache.
—Shakespeare (via refluent)

ukenceto:

pretty much all reasons i have

drinklust:

once i got very drunk in a bar and my mum had to pick me up so i was trying to act normal by keeping the conversation so i asked her if shes a virgin and she looked at me with pain in her eyes and said “i wish i was”

burgrs:

kinda pissed about not being a mermaid

mosoli:

but first, let me take a selkie (steals a mythical half-seal creature from scotland)

carrotsarepeopletoo:

perfcub:

Radical Orpheus descends to the underworld.

he wrote eurydice power ballads with guitar solos so intense they made hades headbang

modestmgmtofficial:

everything’s so funny when u use the wrong measurement:

  • 5 gallons of homework
  • mouthful of lint
  • 20 degrees of facial oil
  • 7 pints of china
  • handful of fergi
  • 60 mph of dad
» Friendly reminder that anyone born between 1985-1998 didn’t get their hogwarts letter because Voldemort’s ministry wiped out the record of muggleborns

yukisamui:

ibuprofanum:

Armor leggings

*heavy breathing*

incurablylazydevil:

If you watch this show carefully, there is a subtext about John drinking. - Steven Moffat

for Clem